I guess I have to do my weekly tv update for you...

1. The Apprentice
I'm happy that Stefani won. I liked her the best, if only because I still think she looked the most like someone who should work for Trump (well, before she died her hair). Besides, it wasn't her fault that the dumb new rules of the show prevented her from ever being PM. Well, if nothing else this show reminded me of why I gave up watching it 2 seasons ago.

2. 24
Ummm, quite honestly I don't even remember much that happened this week. All I know is that if some hot guy was brave enough to battle terrorists to save me I would bother to remember who he was. Any takers?

3. Americas Next Top Model
:( I forgot to tape it tonight. Luckily they always repeat it on Sunday.

4. American Idol
What the fuck American Idol? WHAT. THE. FUCK? After how many years of pulling off show upon show every year, don't you think they could do a little better job at throwing together a charity shindig? If you don't know (and I am assuming that 99.9% of my readership doesn't) tonight American Idol put on a 2-hour charity event to raise money for Africa. And it was quite possibly the choppiest most boring show ever. Yes, the footage of poverty is heartbreaking and yes they raised money and that should be the point (never mind the fact that the money they raised is only a tiny portion of what the show actually brings in each week...) But Seacrest couldn't put together a coherent sentence to save his life (at one point he just looked at Paula and said "you're short.") And then you put together a performance between Celine Dion and ELVIS. And then you still spend the whole night making fun of Sanjaya. And then you for some reason bump off all of the acts you've been promising for weeks! Umm, where were Mr. Bean, Harry Potter, Pink, Borat, Gwen Stefani??? You cut a hell of a lot of people that we were promised.
And then you go through the whole show promising the most socking elimination, make us think Jordan is going home, and then say that you are not voting anyone off on charity night. Yes, that would be the good, compassionate thing to do...if you had said that in the beginning and not made the poor contestant cry! Seriously, it was the worst show ever! Jack Black and the Simpsons were the only highlights.

5. Dinner Impossible
Just wanted to say that this is my new favorite show :)